Shall I write more after that horrid display below? Do you think there could be any other answer besides “yes?”
Want me to tell you an embarrassing story? Ok, ok… But I’m afraid it’ll have to be in two parts. Alright, here goes…
Embarrassing Story: Part One
My junior year of high school, I met a guy named Evan. He moved here from Tennessee. No, he didn’t have an accent. I met him about one or two weeks after school began in September. He came into the Advanced Drama class and my teacher, who prefered to be addressed by his first name, loved him dearly. When try-outs came about for the fall production, guess who won lead? The kid hadn’t been there more than two days, and Hjalmer (yeah, that was my teacher’s name) had him pinned for the lead role. Evan could have stood on his head and made fart-noises with his mouth and Hjalmer would have given him anything he wanted. Yeah, he loved Evan that much.
I wanted the bitterness to seep into my veins. I wanted to yearn for vengeance.
How dare he come along on such short notice and swipe the lead role from every guy, specifically the ones who have been working their butts off for Hjalmer for the last two years?
I wanted to hate him. I wanted to be jealous of him. I wanted to sabotage him! But, alas, I could not bring myself to do it. First of all, it’s not my nature to do such a thing, and secondly, I liked him. A lot.
Eventually, Evan won everyone over and he became as much a part of our dramatic family as anyone else who had been there since the beginning. In fact, he became the class pet with everyone, not just the teacher. After a while, I felt like the daughter in the family who keeps herself locked away in her room, crouched in a dark corner–an admiring zealot of everyone else in the house. Despite my lack of acceptance amongst my fellow thespians, Evan and I were able to establish a fairly strong friendship. Well, he had the friendship and I had the crush.
Homecoming soon came, along with the football game and the dance. The only football game I had ever attended was to the homecoming game, but I hadn’t been to a dance. I wanted to go to a dance. I wanted to dress up and look pretty. I wanted a guy to twirl me around on a dance floor, laughing all the while. I wanted that guy to be Evan.
Erin pushed me on.
“You should just ask him, Carly! I bet he’d say ‘yes!’ He likes you!”
“You think he would?”
“Totally! Just go for it!”
And I did. Oh, how I went for it… More like dashed for it!
When the bell rang, Evan headed for the door, but I caught him by his sleeve at the last moment.
You wanna go to homecoming?
Evan, would you take me to homecoming?
Hey, I was just wondering if maybe you’d wanna go to homecoming with me?
“Would you go to homecoming with me?”
Awkward silence is the most awful, horrible, terrifying thing humankind can ever experience.
“I–” he finally started, but then stopped suddenly.
“I mean, if you don’t want to–”
“No, no… Just… Maybe?”
“I kinda… I gotta ask my parents first.”
“Oh… Ok! Well, that’s cool! Just lemme know! Whenever!”
Quick note: When a girl says, “Just let me know some time” or “Yeah, whenever. Just give me a call.” The smartest thing a guy can do is call within 24 hours. I repeat–call her the very next day, if not sooner.
Two weeks later…
I spot Evan talking to Erin in class. She shakes her head at him and sort of shrugs. Evan nods in an understanding manner and looks over at me. I smile upon making eye contact. We took our seats. At the end of class, I packed my things and started heading for the door. This time, it was my sleeve caught by Evan.
“Uh, I needed to tell you that… Well, my parents are making me take another girl to homecoming.”
“Yeah, a girl I know from church. She’s actually met my parents and they’re comfortable with her.”
“Yeah? I’m sorry, it’s kinda weird…”
“Hey, Evan. It’s totally cool. No problem.”
“Thanks, Carly. Ok, I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Yup, I’ll be here.”
Embarrassing Story: Part Two (finally…)
So, after Evan passed, I ended up asking four other guys to the dance before one of them finally said “yes, if I’m not working that night.” It was my friend Josh from the youth group I used to go to and at the time, he had a girlfriend. In fact, I think they’re still together. We went together as friends, of course, and we had a fun time. He and Evan hit it off right away, now that I remember. We went together as a group to a fancy seafood restaurant prior to the dance. The two boys sat across from each other and I from Evan’s “date” and the four of us got along so famously, you could actually see us swimming around in the “peaches-n-cream.” It was really fun. Although, I will confess, I wished like noneother that I was sitting next to Evan instead of the cute, strawberry blonde with the great personality.
A few months went by and the hype for the next dance was building…
Sadie Hawkins, or “Tolo” as we liked to call it at school. Where the world reverses the direction of its orbit and girls ask guys to the dance, something you thought could only happen in the Bizzare-O World. However, due to past events, I have shown everyone that it can be done at times besides Sadie Hawkins. Any normal girl can ask a guy to a dance whenever she feels like it… Or maybe I’m just from a parallel universe and no one ever told me. However, at this point in time, I didn’t feel ready to ask a guy to a dance. I knew if I wanted to go to one, it would have to come to that point–where I would approach the guy at the end of the day and “pop” the seemingly difficult question. It wouldn’t matter whether it was a girl-asks-guy or guy-asks-girl dance, I knew that in my case, it would always come to that point.
After a miserable time debating over whether I wanted to go to a dance with Evan (which, I obviously did), I finally told Stephanie I was going to do the deed and jump. The day I made this decision was the same day Evan didn’t show up to class. When I saw he wasn’t there, I was somewhat relieved by the fact that I wouldn’t have to ask him that day. However, an evil plot was being twisted and it would seek my demise…
“Carly! Is Evan here today?!”
I turned and saw Laura, the lead romantic interest of our fall production, somewhat ironic due to how the play was “The Matchmaker.” I mentioned before that Evan had gained the lead role for that same play. Lead male role, lead female role–what do you think they’re relationship was in the play?
“Uh, actually… I don’t think he is. I think he’s sick today.” I was totally guessing and just threw out the first explanation that came to mind.
Laura turned a sharp 90 degrees and grasped her best friend’s arm.
Amy shook Laura gently.
“Tomorrow. We’ll do it tomorrow.”
Do what tomorrow?
The next morning, it was gorgeous out. It wasn’t raining, there weren’t any clouds. The sky was a rich blue and a light fog was fading quickly. Frost covered the majority of the cars parked along side the road and the grass we walked on crunched softy under our feet. It was a beautiful beginning to an embarrassing day.
Evan had parked behind me. We both got out of our cars and started the walk up towards school.
“Where were you yesterday?”
“You any better?”
“Yeah, lots. Thanks.”
“Anything happen yesterday?”
“Not much, really…”
“So I didn’t miss anything?”
“No… I think Laura is plotting something against you.”
I smirked in Evan’s direction and searched for any meaning in his reaction. His eyes narrowed and his lips tightened. Was this a good reaction or a bad? I’m not good at reading people.
“Yeah… I actually think they’re setting you up for Tolo.”
“Will you say ‘yes?'”
“I dunno… I wouldn’t want to. I mean… It depends on with who.”
“I mean, I was really hoping I could go with a friend this time. Like a good friend.”
His eyes shot in my direction. I looked back at him. You know that dramatic part in the movie where the two people catch each other’s stares and don’t say anything? They just keep staring?
I cleared my throat.
Evan, do you wanna go to Tolo with me?
How ’bout going with me to Tolo?
I’d like to go to Tolo with you, Evan.
Take me to Tolo?
Take you to Tolo?
You and me–Tolo.
“Well, I’ll see you at lunch, Evan. I gotta get to my English class.”
“…Ok. In the courtyard?”
“Yeah. I’ll save you a spot.”
Fifth period came, the second to last class of the day, the class which came before drama. I ran to Stephanie and pleaded for her help. I was almost sure Laura was going to ask Evan to the dance and I was sure it would happen before the days’ end.
“I’ve got to do something. What should we do?”
We skipped class and booked it to TOP Foods where I purchased a card, a flower, and I think something else I have since forgotten… But that doesn’t matter. What matters is that in the card, I asked him.
When we got back, Stephanie and I got the wicked idea to place everything on his car for him to see when school let out. I just prayed he would see it before saying “yes” to anyone else’s Tolo proposals. I should have known otherwise…
We got back up to school about two minutes before sixth period was to start. I got to class by taking the back door into the auditorium, where the class was held. I stepped in at the pivitol moment…
Laura stood at the foot of the stage with a cup of chocolate pudding held up by her hand. Pudding referred to a certain line in the play. Pudding meant adventure. Pudding meant something wonderful. Pudding meant love.
I stood, staring stupidly from the back. I could say nothing. I could do nothing. I just watched knowing was about to happen.
Laura laughed adorably.
The rest of class looked in Evan’s direction. After a pause, they started chanting, “Pudding! Pudding! Pudding!”
With every time they shouted the word, the more my heart became like pudding itself… Chocolate pudding heart oozing down my chest, making its way to my stomach, where it wasn’t settling well.
Evan forced a smile.
And that basically sums up my embarrassing story–